It’s not
easy to forgive. Yet if we don’t, the original offense done to us metastasizes,
spreading poison through more and more of our life. To be spiritually healthy requires
that we both receive and give forgiveness.
Our Lord’s
Prayer models this receiving and giving. In the acrostic I use for my
devotions, P-R-A-Y-E-R, this is Y – Yield confession and forgiveness. Jesus
said we should pray, and forgive us our sins, as we ourselves have forgiven
everyone who is indebted to us (Luke 11:4).
“Forgive”
means to send or put away. The debt of our sins is “put away” because Jesus
paid it. The only basis for receiving forgiveness is the sacrifice
of Jesus.
But notice how Jesus links our receiving forgiveness with our willingness to give it to others: forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors (Matthew 6:12). No wonder that when people refuse to forgive others, they feel disconnected from the love and forgiveness of God for themselves.
When I reach the "Y" in my daily prayers, forgive us our sins, I'm usually very aware of my trespasses. It’s easy to name them, to confess them to the Lord, and to receive His forgiveness. Occasionally I won't have anything on my conscience. And in those times I just ask, "Lord, if there is anything I've done that has been displeasing to You, please remind me so that I can confess it to You...." And He does. Images, memories, thoughts of unconfessed sin will flash in my mind, and I will then yield them up to the Lord.
The second part of "Y" is as we have also forgiven...You hear the echo of Jesus' words in Paul's letter to the Colossians: ...forgiving each other as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive (3:13b).
I think
there are two common mistakes when it comes to forgiving others. One is refusing to do it and letting bitterness infect our hearts. The other is minimizing how hard it is, and assuming it's a one-time declaration instead of a process.
By faith I must forgive. I must entrust Him with my pain, and leave it all in His hands. I must give the person who has hurt me up to God. Forgiveness is my calling; it is my Lord's command.
But sometimes, even when I have forgiven, pain and anger continue to flare up within me. That's probably a signal that I need the help of a trusted friend or counselor. Sometimes forgiveness is both a decision and a process, with the goal to let God's grace seep down into all the hurt places in my heart. This could take some time.
But since we have a God who is shaping us for eternity, taking some time is okay. Forgiveness helps us release our grip on the past, and relax into the hands of the One who holds us for Himself, now and forever.
FOR NEXT TIME: prayEr - Expect Guidance and Protection
